Friday, August 04, 2006 10:04 PM
seen the vp.
not i a v good experience i wld say.
went to the general office on thurs.
sat down at the sofa n waited.
then spencer cam out n told me it was bad.
ok so it WAS bad.
the moment i stepped in.
she asked those same qns tt the teachers asked.
[got frustrated]
didn't know wad to say.
so i just let the tear glands do the job.
wadeva.
bad experience.
spent a freaking 1 hr to do a workplan which she wanted.
waste of time.
lol kept saying i wanted to die tt day.
but nah...
too afraid of pain.
but mayb[just mayb] if i do go crazy i might reli just jump off a building without myself knowing. haha.
so it was like a reli bad day for me tt day.
then i kept saying stupid stuff like jumping off from the 2nd floor of the sch wun kill me.
at most i'll just bcome a vegetable, even if i do land head first.
a teacher heard me n she totally freaked out, her jaws dropped.
lol [tt was according to corine]
hahaha.
my tears glands sure worked hard tt day.
it was a non-stop tap, just kept flowing.
got reli tired.
realise i became so haggard n there were dark rings n eyebags.
i looked totally 'yuck'.
[it's just tt i look v frail?? i mean i look reli tired]
haben been getting enuf slp.
thruout the week i got abt 19hrs of slp.
an average of abt less than 4hrs of slp a day.
cool...to tink i can stil survive.
woah. i m amazed.
***
eversince i came to tis sch.
i have mastered two skills.
the ability to be a walking zombie n
the ability to let my tears flow whenever n where-ever i wan.
just in sch today.
we had to meet our pw teacher regarding the grp issue.
there was some displeasure amongst the grp members.
it was 4 against 1.
actually it was more like 2 against 1 n the other 2 was sitting on the fence.
then my teacher was supposedly the 'meditator'.
well he didnt quite do his job in meditating us.
he just stood there n got us to voice out our happiness.
well it all started w tis boy or guy [wadeva he is]
anyway, he didnt quite do his part for the grp so me n another grp member got reli pissed.
so we confronted the teacher.
yup. so the teacher got us together which wasnt reli of any help bcos i got reli pissed.
my face looked horrid.
i was glaring at tt guy n i gave my teacher the 'dun-u-dare-piss-me-off' look.
my teacher knew i was unhappy w the whole thing.
asked me to voice out wad i felt.
com'on!! i've talked to him nicely i even screamed at him!!
wad more can i do if tt boy or guy doesn't even wana do his part right??!!
man...i'm pissed.
[the keyboard is gonna go soon. at the way i'm typing the keys on the board might just get stuck. i'm pressing real hard on evry key right now cos i'm reli pissed. lol]
==>[sorry for the lack of vocab. but pissed is just the right word to describ ewad i'm feeling right now]
ok mayb frustrated as well.
i feel lousy anyway.
i even talked back at the teacher cos he said,"u all shud try to get along cos afterall u all chose the grp."
o.O
i said,"NO..! we didn't choose the grps ourselves!"
it was a good thing the teach didnt hear me.
i cld have sworn tt i wld have killed 'uh-hmm' if i had a knife in my hand.slit his throat n let the air leak from his windpipe til his lungs deflate.
n cut all his arteries n let his blood run dry then i'll minced the meat. wahaha.lol. i most prob wld have been jailed for tt.
haha. lightest sentence wld have been man-slaughter.
life sentence in jail.
[sorry. woman=evil]
***
then after sch we had bio remedial lectures.
i broke down as soon as i went out of the lecture theatre.
i duno y but my tears glands just went against me.
i reli din wana cry.
i just cldnt help it.
[morale=still 0]
